October 9, 2010
Jacob’s pumpkin.
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Project 365 – Day 50
October 8, 2010
Big and squirmy for 10 weeks, so my due date got moved up a day (does it make much of a difference?).
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Attachment
Going through a deployment with a (now) toddler is hard at times. I know that he has rough days, because of the tantrums and crying fits, or clingy to me. But I don’t always know if that’s because he is teething, he doesn’t feel well, he is tired, if he misses his dad, or maybe all of the above. Currently at 12 months, Jacob only has a few words – mama, dada, kitty, dog, and something that sounds like thank you – so he can’t tell me what is going on either. Still for the most part I’m able to read his cues and guess what he needs, and calm him down.
I have to admit, I really thought he would take things a lot worse. Considering we didn’t move back home for the deployment, we are surrounded by men everywhere in uniform. I was almost convinced he would cry or call every guy he saw “dada” like I’ve seen other children do. Yet, he seems to know they aren’t his dad. Although he studies them closely, his eyes don’t light up like they do when he sees a picture or his daddy on the computer. Jacob seems to have figured out that his daddy and the computer are connected. When I go to check my email in the morning he stares at the computer and yells “dada” hoping that it will be time for a video chat. I just hope he doesn’t start to think his daddy lives in the computer!
Going back to the reading cues though. I think my experience working in therapeutic preschools, and going to school for marriage and family therapy trained me to decode and look for interventions or treatments. With older kids there are a bunch of helpful play therapy techniques to help teach coping skills for a deployment, and when we get to that stage I will be ready. However, for now, what I need to be reminded of is the importance of attachment. Fostering a secure attachment with your child can buffer them against all sorts of stressful events. Attachment is as simple as holding him, singing to him, reading a book, talking in a loving tone, and responding to his needs (diaper changes, hunger, etc.). It’s pretty comforting knowing that what he needs right now is what I am already doing, and that will get him through the rough days.
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Project 365 – Day 48
October 6, 2010
The rabbit died.
This rabbit has been living in our yard for awhile, I used to see it run by in the mornings. Diesel wanted to catch it, and today he got his wish. At dinner I saw the rabbit go by the window in Diesel’s jaw. I freaked out and tried to figure out what to do while the rabbit was dying in the yard. I thought about shooting it, but the idea of pulling a .45 on a suffering little bunny didn’t settle well with me, I thought about using a shovel, but I couldn’t do that either. I made a few phone calls to animal control, and TN wildlife, and a friend. By this time the rabbit had died on it’s own. I’m sorry that Diesel wounded you mr. bunny, but I’m thankful I didn’t have to finish you off. And I’m sorry for putting you in a trash bag in the dumpster 
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